For me, it’s about a vibe, not a bag or a jacket. Amy Smilovic (Tibi) taught me that the best fits are an expression of self & how I want to feel in my clothes. I’m old, curvy & fabulous; fashion trends don’t resonate. But when I see something that looks like me (my vibe and intention on my best days), I pursue it. Your feed, The Row, Tibi, dosa & Frances de Lordes are giving me that right now. So here I am spending real $$$ and building a capsule by TR that suits me. I don’t buy “to keep up with the Joneses” or in this case, the Olsens. But I do & will continue to buy to keep up with me. I couldn’t care less about who else is wearing what I have b/c they are not me & good for them. My shopping is selfish & loud at the same time, a personal shout out & expression of the whole wonder of ME, and she’s worth the expense of it all.
We’ve chatted via comments on this before- and the way you love the Row, is the way I love Bottega. I was a fan during the Thomas Maier era, when I bought my first handbag. As the brand has grown in popularity, I see the dupes everywhere and the influencers with their andiamo clutches, and a part of me misses when BV was an under the radar luxury brand. I miss when Amazon wasn’t selling $20 versions of it. I miss when people didn’t know what I was carrying and now people stop me and ask “is that the limited edition HOP or kalimero, etc etc”.
I’ve been shopping for my clothing- small, independent brands that feel aligned with my personal style and I think that has been allowing me a sense of “special” and “exclusivity” that I don’t get anymore from shopping the contemporary and heritage brands that the internet now know and love too.
I feel like there are those of us who stumble upon brands that resonate with us entirely, and we latch on (Dries Van Noten, Bottega, Ulla Johnson, Christopher John Roger’s and once upon a time, Pucci- as of late I’m seeing all the Tik Tok girlies wearing the pieces I prided on wearing, now I’m less inclined to). But we have to remember that these are in fact brands- and as much as they are considerate of design, aesthetic, craftsmanship and materials- they are also in the self-interest of scaling up and making as much money as possible- to cash in on mass favorability while they can.
I think it’s refreshing to take a step back and explore those under the radar designers- and I think that’s the throughline of your work on the internet- has been to wear and excitedly share the pieces and offerings we may not have explored and been exposed to. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with having an “era” of feeling that a designer completely resonates- and as they begin to shift, so do we. I think that’s what keeps our wardrobes and our fever for good fashion (good style, rather) effervescent.
Once upon a time in Miami's Design District, every chair at lunch held a big bright Birkin. Now Margaux is there with little Kelly. And, oh, I get just how it makes you feel. Eagerly following these breadcrumbs. Thank you for thinking and probing as you do and inspiring us to the same.
Love this perspective! And would love if you could share (next article?) some of your favorite up and coming, smaller, quieter brands. The “old” Row, in a sense.
To me, it's timeless perfection and refined aesthetics. I miss the times when it was niche luxury as I'm into The Row for more than a decade, way before the whole world started to be into The Row. At this stage of my life I rarely buy anything else that The Row because I know that I will tire of it in a way I never tire of The Row.
I am loving The Row mostly because of you- your posts- videos- articles. I was exposed before you, but you’ve enhanced my experience and desire for more. Two of my favorite purchases this summer are my black nylon bag and the higher red and black flip flops!! I own and buy other brands, but it’s been hard not to just want all TR as it’s all so beautiful and low key. And I have been sharing your articles and some posts as you opened a door that makes me happy. Why not share that!
I felt a similar way about my love for Phoebe Philo’s Cèline, the ubiquity of the phantom bag was exactly why I never wanted one. It was interesting, though, because I felt like the people who had a phantom bag, more often than not, didn’t otherwise encompass the Phoebe Philo woman as we think of her. Not that that’s a prerequisite to purchase, but as a result those hyper popular pieces somehow became separate from the brand, and almost invisible to those who really resonated with the Cèline woman (in my opinion). I feel like The Row is becoming similar: there’s people who buy some pieces from The Row, and people who buy The Row because it’s DNA is their DNA. I will also say, I love their foray into trendier pieces, as ironic as it sounds. It feels like art to me. Like their classic, enduring pieces are like gallery walls, and these unexpected, often cheeky, accents are like the art. Putting a rubber flip flop with perfect tailoring and luxe fabrics is unexpected and that’s exactly what makes it work. A grown up jelly adds a touch of whimsy. I sort of think of investing in these trendier items like buying art. I do feel like the dupes lessen this effect, but I suppose they’ve always been around, even for art. That said, I have also been enjoying finding some new brands lately. One of my favorite parts of social media.
Ps. I’m team leather banana bag. I think it’s my most used bag, it goes with almost anything I could wear in my closet. It never crossed my mind to get the nylon at the time, but I can see why so many love it as well. Just such a wonderful bag all around.
I feel the same way about the Margaux. It seems like the people carrying it now aren’t necessarily embodying The Row’s aesthetic but as you said, that’s not a requirement. The thing is, I loved that bag from the beginning, and in some ways, it’s spoiled. If another one of their bags has risen to this level of popularity, I wouldn’t mind. I like to differentiate. Ubiquity just isn’t inspiring. I want to feel inspired, and I want to inspire, and that’s harder when everyone starts to look the same.
And I completely agree with you. These non-classical pieces have been a fun foray into something they hadn’t really touched before. It’s been unexpected, but I’ve actually loved watching them put out styles that feel playful, to shock the system, alongside the usual uniform. And it definitely feels very MK.
I like The Row but never understood the collective obsession over bags like their Margaux. It reminds me of a Tod’s bag from 1990-2000s, albeit an updated version. In fact, several of The Row bags mimic former styles from Tod’s. Fashion amnesia at play here? Certainly gives me pause and puts pricey Row purchases into perspective for me.
I’m not sure about the collective minds, but I certainly loved it from the beginning. The simplicity of the design, the discreet hardware, the supple leather, and way back - the lack of popularity. Things have shifted though so now I wonder what it is I’m buying.
If it's classic/ simple/ clean/ quiet, I don't care if others wear it--because we'll all style it differently, make it our own. (if you're old enough to remember when everyone in high school wore either Lee or Levis--maybe the odd pair of GWGs--we ALL could instantly recognize whose jeans were whose. As straightforward as they were, somehow, we made them ours, and only ours.) If TR drops the ball on quality, on refinement, that's when I'll care.
This is very well written and I really enjoyed it. Even forwarded to my husband. I’ve admired TR for years but never really understood it until I ventured into the nyc store last month and tried on a pair of loafers. The quality and feel was incredible. I’ve now purchased the Marlo (arrives tomorrow) and tstrap shoes. I like you prefer things not everyone is carrying/wearing but the quality above all is what matters to me. I’ll continue to invest in this brand until you tell us you have found the new secret for us to shop. Love your insight and appreciate your iconic style.
Thank you for the feedback and for forwarding the article. 🥰
The Row makes beautiful pieces and they’re edgy and it keeps us all hooked, but it’s been nice looking out the window and wondering what else is there. I’ll keep doing that and try to bring new brands into the spotlight.
Beautifully written. Thank you for articulating exactly how I feel right on point. I’ve been a devote since the day they launched and continue to be so warm. Regards.
For me, it’s more about quiet confidence than it is about quiet luxury. The Row does that for me but so do other minimalist brands with lower price points. (Thousands of other woman may have the same COS T-shirt but they won't wear it like I do!) We all want to be special but often forget that it’s a constellation of factors that make it so. Combine style with other attributes like intelligence, compassion, and humility and you’re at the head of the pack. Neelam, I suspect you could make an ensemble from Walmart look chic, sophisticated, and effortless. I love your style because, well, it’s quintessentially you. Yes, I’ll happily emulate many of your “looks” but more importantly I want to be like you and project quiet confidence with grace and style. Thank you for all you do. Stumbling across your content has been a highlight of 2025 for me…
Paula!! 🥹What a kind thing to say. Thank you. I think personal styling has a lot to do with it. So many women have great style and we just need to let go of what’s trending to explore that. I love seeing people break from the pack and make a piece their own. And our hive is a great example, unique styling! 🤍
Great article! Style and identity surely go hand in hand. I’ve def found that fashion is a way of experimenting and finding ourselves. I love the questions you pose. Although purchases can seem simple, I certainly overthink them and often reflect on what they satisfy or represent. Do they fulfill a need in my closet ? Do they satisfy the things that might be missing in my life? Do they reflect my personality and my style? Do they add something to my public self that feels new or different or a little exciting? Am I trying to fit in or go against the grain? Are they just impulsive:)? As you suggest, these is lots to consider. I will say that I too was drawn to TR because of your style, Neelam, and your ability to convey how special these pieces really are. Luv being part of the hive. Ty:)
Love having you in the hive, and thank you for being so supportive of my work. I think it’s good to continue to question why we buy things. Keeps us in check. 🥰
Ding, Ding, Ding! So on the nose, as always Neelam! Reading your Note is so refreshing and concise - you organize all the thoughts running around in my head❣ Thanks for that-I can use all the help I can get! xoxox
For me, it’s about a vibe, not a bag or a jacket. Amy Smilovic (Tibi) taught me that the best fits are an expression of self & how I want to feel in my clothes. I’m old, curvy & fabulous; fashion trends don’t resonate. But when I see something that looks like me (my vibe and intention on my best days), I pursue it. Your feed, The Row, Tibi, dosa & Frances de Lordes are giving me that right now. So here I am spending real $$$ and building a capsule by TR that suits me. I don’t buy “to keep up with the Joneses” or in this case, the Olsens. But I do & will continue to buy to keep up with me. I couldn’t care less about who else is wearing what I have b/c they are not me & good for them. My shopping is selfish & loud at the same time, a personal shout out & expression of the whole wonder of ME, and she’s worth the expense of it all.
💯and I love your style and how you blend brands. 🤍
totally agree, Patty. Well said and yes, we are old enough to know what we like and how we like to wear it!
And isn’t It GREAT?!?
Amy Smilovic is amazing ! Her book The Creative Pragmatist is a must read 😍😍🙏🏽
We’ve chatted via comments on this before- and the way you love the Row, is the way I love Bottega. I was a fan during the Thomas Maier era, when I bought my first handbag. As the brand has grown in popularity, I see the dupes everywhere and the influencers with their andiamo clutches, and a part of me misses when BV was an under the radar luxury brand. I miss when Amazon wasn’t selling $20 versions of it. I miss when people didn’t know what I was carrying and now people stop me and ask “is that the limited edition HOP or kalimero, etc etc”.
I’ve been shopping for my clothing- small, independent brands that feel aligned with my personal style and I think that has been allowing me a sense of “special” and “exclusivity” that I don’t get anymore from shopping the contemporary and heritage brands that the internet now know and love too.
I feel like there are those of us who stumble upon brands that resonate with us entirely, and we latch on (Dries Van Noten, Bottega, Ulla Johnson, Christopher John Roger’s and once upon a time, Pucci- as of late I’m seeing all the Tik Tok girlies wearing the pieces I prided on wearing, now I’m less inclined to). But we have to remember that these are in fact brands- and as much as they are considerate of design, aesthetic, craftsmanship and materials- they are also in the self-interest of scaling up and making as much money as possible- to cash in on mass favorability while they can.
I think it’s refreshing to take a step back and explore those under the radar designers- and I think that’s the throughline of your work on the internet- has been to wear and excitedly share the pieces and offerings we may not have explored and been exposed to. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with having an “era” of feeling that a designer completely resonates- and as they begin to shift, so do we. I think that’s what keeps our wardrobes and our fever for good fashion (good style, rather) effervescent.
Word for word hooked. Everything you said and yes, my God what Tomas M did for Bottega. ❤️
But they’re in the money making business like everyone else and as you say, as they evolve, so too, do we. 🙏🏽
Once upon a time in Miami's Design District, every chair at lunch held a big bright Birkin. Now Margaux is there with little Kelly. And, oh, I get just how it makes you feel. Eagerly following these breadcrumbs. Thank you for thinking and probing as you do and inspiring us to the same.
I know and maybe someday everyone else will move on from it, or maybe I’ll get over this self-limiting roadblock. Ha!
Love this perspective! And would love if you could share (next article?) some of your favorite up and coming, smaller, quieter brands. The “old” Row, in a sense.
Oh great idea! Will do xo
To me, it's timeless perfection and refined aesthetics. I miss the times when it was niche luxury as I'm into The Row for more than a decade, way before the whole world started to be into The Row. At this stage of my life I rarely buy anything else that The Row because I know that I will tire of it in a way I never tire of The Row.
So true. We don’t tire of The Row. I wonder if I’ll be able to say the same of their trendier pieces. Hope so, they’re still my bread and butter. 😋
I think so 😊 Jolene is trendy but timeless. So are many other trendy pieces.
I am loving The Row mostly because of you- your posts- videos- articles. I was exposed before you, but you’ve enhanced my experience and desire for more. Two of my favorite purchases this summer are my black nylon bag and the higher red and black flip flops!! I own and buy other brands, but it’s been hard not to just want all TR as it’s all so beautiful and low key. And I have been sharing your articles and some posts as you opened a door that makes me happy. Why not share that!
Aww, thanks Lisa. And yes I know the feeling. It could easily be a one-stop-shop and bankrupt us all at once! Good to have other options too. 🥰
I felt a similar way about my love for Phoebe Philo’s Cèline, the ubiquity of the phantom bag was exactly why I never wanted one. It was interesting, though, because I felt like the people who had a phantom bag, more often than not, didn’t otherwise encompass the Phoebe Philo woman as we think of her. Not that that’s a prerequisite to purchase, but as a result those hyper popular pieces somehow became separate from the brand, and almost invisible to those who really resonated with the Cèline woman (in my opinion). I feel like The Row is becoming similar: there’s people who buy some pieces from The Row, and people who buy The Row because it’s DNA is their DNA. I will also say, I love their foray into trendier pieces, as ironic as it sounds. It feels like art to me. Like their classic, enduring pieces are like gallery walls, and these unexpected, often cheeky, accents are like the art. Putting a rubber flip flop with perfect tailoring and luxe fabrics is unexpected and that’s exactly what makes it work. A grown up jelly adds a touch of whimsy. I sort of think of investing in these trendier items like buying art. I do feel like the dupes lessen this effect, but I suppose they’ve always been around, even for art. That said, I have also been enjoying finding some new brands lately. One of my favorite parts of social media.
Ps. I’m team leather banana bag. I think it’s my most used bag, it goes with almost anything I could wear in my closet. It never crossed my mind to get the nylon at the time, but I can see why so many love it as well. Just such a wonderful bag all around.
I feel the same way about the Margaux. It seems like the people carrying it now aren’t necessarily embodying The Row’s aesthetic but as you said, that’s not a requirement. The thing is, I loved that bag from the beginning, and in some ways, it’s spoiled. If another one of their bags has risen to this level of popularity, I wouldn’t mind. I like to differentiate. Ubiquity just isn’t inspiring. I want to feel inspired, and I want to inspire, and that’s harder when everyone starts to look the same.
And I completely agree with you. These non-classical pieces have been a fun foray into something they hadn’t really touched before. It’s been unexpected, but I’ve actually loved watching them put out styles that feel playful, to shock the system, alongside the usual uniform. And it definitely feels very MK.
I save so much more money now because I know what I like and what looks good on me. I still make mistakes but that is fine!
I like The Row but never understood the collective obsession over bags like their Margaux. It reminds me of a Tod’s bag from 1990-2000s, albeit an updated version. In fact, several of The Row bags mimic former styles from Tod’s. Fashion amnesia at play here? Certainly gives me pause and puts pricey Row purchases into perspective for me.
I’m not sure about the collective minds, but I certainly loved it from the beginning. The simplicity of the design, the discreet hardware, the supple leather, and way back - the lack of popularity. Things have shifted though so now I wonder what it is I’m buying.
If it's classic/ simple/ clean/ quiet, I don't care if others wear it--because we'll all style it differently, make it our own. (if you're old enough to remember when everyone in high school wore either Lee or Levis--maybe the odd pair of GWGs--we ALL could instantly recognize whose jeans were whose. As straightforward as they were, somehow, we made them ours, and only ours.) If TR drops the ball on quality, on refinement, that's when I'll care.
Love this and thanks for the reminder. I was a Levi’s gal all the way and I’ve been buying 80s vintage all over again. ❤️
This is very well written and I really enjoyed it. Even forwarded to my husband. I’ve admired TR for years but never really understood it until I ventured into the nyc store last month and tried on a pair of loafers. The quality and feel was incredible. I’ve now purchased the Marlo (arrives tomorrow) and tstrap shoes. I like you prefer things not everyone is carrying/wearing but the quality above all is what matters to me. I’ll continue to invest in this brand until you tell us you have found the new secret for us to shop. Love your insight and appreciate your iconic style.
Thank you for the feedback and for forwarding the article. 🥰
The Row makes beautiful pieces and they’re edgy and it keeps us all hooked, but it’s been nice looking out the window and wondering what else is there. I’ll keep doing that and try to bring new brands into the spotlight.
Beautifully written. Thank you for articulating exactly how I feel right on point. I’ve been a devote since the day they launched and continue to be so warm. Regards.
Thanks Lynette, it’s something I keep thinking about and I’m now digging into past collections more often.
Hi Neelam I’m having trouble upgrading to a paid subscription?
Have you tried from a desktop vs phone?
This is on mobile, but I’ll try on desktop - thank you
For me, it’s more about quiet confidence than it is about quiet luxury. The Row does that for me but so do other minimalist brands with lower price points. (Thousands of other woman may have the same COS T-shirt but they won't wear it like I do!) We all want to be special but often forget that it’s a constellation of factors that make it so. Combine style with other attributes like intelligence, compassion, and humility and you’re at the head of the pack. Neelam, I suspect you could make an ensemble from Walmart look chic, sophisticated, and effortless. I love your style because, well, it’s quintessentially you. Yes, I’ll happily emulate many of your “looks” but more importantly I want to be like you and project quiet confidence with grace and style. Thank you for all you do. Stumbling across your content has been a highlight of 2025 for me…
Paula!! 🥹What a kind thing to say. Thank you. I think personal styling has a lot to do with it. So many women have great style and we just need to let go of what’s trending to explore that. I love seeing people break from the pack and make a piece their own. And our hive is a great example, unique styling! 🤍
Great article! Style and identity surely go hand in hand. I’ve def found that fashion is a way of experimenting and finding ourselves. I love the questions you pose. Although purchases can seem simple, I certainly overthink them and often reflect on what they satisfy or represent. Do they fulfill a need in my closet ? Do they satisfy the things that might be missing in my life? Do they reflect my personality and my style? Do they add something to my public self that feels new or different or a little exciting? Am I trying to fit in or go against the grain? Are they just impulsive:)? As you suggest, these is lots to consider. I will say that I too was drawn to TR because of your style, Neelam, and your ability to convey how special these pieces really are. Luv being part of the hive. Ty:)
Love having you in the hive, and thank you for being so supportive of my work. I think it’s good to continue to question why we buy things. Keeps us in check. 🥰
Ty❤️
Ding, Ding, Ding! So on the nose, as always Neelam! Reading your Note is so refreshing and concise - you organize all the thoughts running around in my head❣ Thanks for that-I can use all the help I can get! xoxox
Haha! You’re doing fine Lisa! Sometimes my mind wanders, and this is where it landed this time. :))